I have been like, mostly good this year. Except maybe for last weekend’s holiday party. I blame the stress. Sometimes you have to cut loose.
Also, I want you to understand that the state of this house in no way reflects upon my moral character. Some of us are gifted in the homely arts. Some of us are not. Special snowflakes, etc., etc.
Anyhoo, Nick… Mind if I call you Nick? It seems more adult. Nick, there is nothing I need this Christmas that I don’t already have in abundance: three beautiful sons, an adoring husband, my phenomenal mother, my best girl Lennie, and so many wonderful friends and relatives. I am veeerrry fond of you, but they are my favriotes. Anything you bring is icing.
Speaking of icing. We made you some cookies. God bless you, and God bless us, every one.
P.S. Meet me later on the roof.